Thursday, March 20, 2008

Comic Relief

OK, I think after my last post you might need a laugh. I know I do.

I've decided to share my most embarassing moment ever with all my dear bloggies. This is a privelege to be cherished. The spousal unit once told this story among friends without my permission and got the cold shoulder for days.

About 5 years ago I got laid off. My company had been a startup, was purchased by a huge defense contractor and was subsequently run into the ground. I was one of many victims of their incompetence.

The weekend after the axe dropped we went down to New Mexico to visit family. We stayed with my mother-in-law. I'd made plans to have a night out with some girlfriends, and the spousal unit went out with his own friends that same evening.

I got TANKED. My friends did too. They were smart and got picked up/driven home by the men in their lives. I was too drunk and full of self-pity to be that responsible and drove home. Luckily the story continues and does not involve me heading to jail.

Back at my mother-in-law's, I was fumbling to dress for bed. Where in the hell is that pajama top! Ah who cares, I don't need it, I slurred to myself and crawled into bed.

The next morning, I awoke with a pounding headache and a suspicion that I had done something incredibly embarassing. Must have been a bad dream. I rose, found the missing pajama top on the floor, and fell back into bed. The spousal unit was already awake and came back into the room braying with laughter. Looks like it was no dream.

Apparently after I'd partially dressed for bed, I went into the bathroom to pee. When I came out, I stumbled back into the bedroom. My mother-in-law's bedroom.

I proceeded to crawl into bed topless with my mother-in-law and spoon her. Seems in my stupor I thought she was the spousal unit. She tried to right the situation but I dismissed her protests, saying I was quite comfortable. I didn't leave her bed until the spousal unit got home and managed to drag me back to our room.

I'm very lucky that my mother-in-law has a good sense of humor. Her biggest concern was that I'd driven home in that state.


BeckEye said...

Ha ha ha! That's like something out of a movie.

chelene said...

She's a wonderful woman because I would have told you to get your boobs back to your own bed!

Slave to the dogs said...

Beckeye - if I'd been watching that movie I'd have been poking huge fun at that stupid drunk chick.

Chelene - I'm very lucky to have such a sweet mother-in-law. I think I would have dragged my drunk ass daughter-in-law out of bed and left her on the floor.

justacoolcat said...

Youch. Hilarious!

I once stumbled blind drunk and naked into a Congressman's bed at my buddies house. Luckily, my friends parents were not home that weekend.

MamaSoon said...

Now, that earns the title of embarrassing. Congratulations on a very funny post. My question now is... do you still have drinks when visiting said mother in law?

Tanya Espanya said...

Bwahahaha! that's excellent! You're so least I only puked out the car window...


Slave to the dogs said...

Cat, you didn't tell me you knew the McGreevy's! ;)

mamasoon - come to think of it I doubt I've had any more than a drink or two every time we've been back since!

Tanya - hey, it could have been worse, I could have puked on her too.

Pugs said...

Oh my God, ROFL! Who did you go out with Rosie? I was thinking as I was reading this that you were going to throw in a hefty barf for good measure. Thank God that didn't happen...again, lol!