Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Do you think he didn't notice?

Yesterday I took my flight home from Boston. And no, I was not concerned about flying on 9/1l. I seriously doubt that another plane-bomb attack will be attempted on that date in the forseeable future. But the flight was very empty, and I was afforded a coveted exit-row seat.

Unfortunately, this seat was near the toilet. An older businessman (normally I'd refer to him as a gentleman, but not in this case) across the aisle from me kept ducking into the toilet. Whenever he emerged, I was immediately assaulted with the most horrific odor. Seriously, I think the guy was committing war crimes in there. At first I thought it was the bathroom itself, but I noticed that the odor was not present when other passengers left the crime scene.

So did he not care about the torture he was submitting his fellow passengers to? Or do you think he felt so crappy all he was interested in was just evacuating the toxic waste from his body? His demeanor was annoyingly pleasant otherwise, so I have my doubts about the latter option. I think maybe it smelled of roses to him, because it was his.

But you'd think the nasty faces and dramatic arm hand waving in front of my nose from me might have clued him that it was not so.


mur said...

It was probably the end result of the Airline's vacuum packed tuna sandwich or Spaghetti Bolognese he injested for lunch.
My 19 yr old son was caught surrepticiously spraying his stinky fellow passenger on a train with his deoderant a few months ago and nearly got a punch on the nose for his trouble, lol.

Tanya Espanya said...

Ahahaha, how lovely!

And then we get told not to wear perfume because some people might have allergies...Allergy this!

Slave to the dogs said...

Mur - the airlines stateside don't feed us back in steerage anymore, so it wasn't that. Could have been some bad airport food. And I applaud your son's cheek!

Tanya - believe me, I was wishing I had some perfume to spray after Mr. Stinky dropped his bomb.

Anonymous said...

What would you have had him do?

mur said...

Sew up his arse?

Slave to the dogs said...

Rhet - he could have made an attempt to air out or cover up the offending odor. Wash his hands vigorously with the scented soap they keep in there. He was seated with a female companion - could have borrowed some perfume from her. There were many options!