2 Degrees of Bubba Clinton

I recently started seeing a new hairstylist. She's a friend from our softball team and she works at a very reputable salon downtown. She just found out last week that she's been selected to do hair and makeup for Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama, and Caroline Kennedy next week for the DNC. In addition to the coolness factor she'll make some major bank off the deal. I can't wait to hear how it goes.

Beckeye, do you have time to grab my pic off MySpace and put some Hillary hair on it? ;) I'd do it myself but you all have seen my (lack of) Photoshopping skills.

So let's see, the connection goes:

Slave-->Hairdresser-->Hillary-->Bubba

That's only 2 degrees, right? Aweosme thing is that puts God Barack and JFK at the same level. ;)

Next week is going to be madness. As much as I'd like to ogle I think the best thing to do is avoid downtown at all costs.

In the Minority

I admit that I am NOT one of the millions of Americans who is enamored with Michael Phelps.

I can appreciate his athletic prowess. The guy's got major talent. But he seems like an arrogant creep.

Did you see him screaming at his teammates in the 800X relay? They more than doubled the lead you created in the opening leg, buddy. Sit down. You are great but you are not alone.

On the Trail

Tomorrow I'm going to spend 3 hours canvassing for my Presidential candidate of choice. Monday I'm making calls for him. I hope I don't get too many door/phone slams.

Grasping

I've clearly become bored of the diary blog format and need something new. Trying to figure out what that "new" is. Suggestions?

Whew...

This is what 11 years of consulting does to you. I've been everywhere that's red.


visited 39 states (78%)
Create your own visited map of The United States or determine the next president

Clearly I need to get in a car and head north for about 8 hours to expand the territory.

Thanks Megan for the link!

Reorg

Forgive me all. I'm juggling a million balls right now and I've dropped the blog ball temporarily. I'll pick it up again once all the other balls are back where they belong. I apologize that I'm not sure how long that will take.

As a tide over...

Any Grey's Anatomy or Boston Legal fans out there? If so, you'll be intrigued to hear that I saw Brooke Smith (Dr. Erica Hahn) and Saffron Burrows at the airport in Burlington, Vermont yesterday. They were going through security together. I don't watch Grey's or Boston but I recognized Saffron (she's extremely thin in person) from Circle of Friends, and my avid Grey's fan colleague picked out Brooke immediately. Strange place to intersect with the C list.

Wait for it...

Sorry kids...will update you soon with tales of horrid call center outsourcing experiences, mermaids sprouting appendages from their bottoms that weren't tails and Beckeye in person...

Politicians and condoms

I got an email earlier from an online retailer with a subject line that began:

2-Pk Hi-Fi Earphones = $10, Trojans = $10

If your mind is in the gutter like mine you know what you thought they were selling. This place normally sells electronics, so I figured I must not be in-the-know about the latest cell phone model, or some other gadget named by a marketing team with a kindergarten sense of humor.

Nope. Turns out it is indeed a 24-pack of raincoats. It's been many years since I've had to buy any, but it sounds like a bargain. And tres discreet buying online. Just hope you don't need them tonight!

I just got back from the King of Prussia mall. Holy shopping Mecca! I heard it was one of the largest in the country and I was only disappointed that I had so little time to explore.

Urban Outfitters had 2 T-shirts picturing Barack Obama. I nearly picked one up in part to amuse the spousal unit, who calls me "Obama Fangirl". The problem was that they were both possibly racist, and most certainly weird.

The first pictured his likeness with the slogan "Obama for ya Mama!" While not as bad as the Curious George shirts, I wasn't quite comfortable with this. If I weren't Whitey McSquare I might pull this shirt off but it's one trail I'm not going to attempt to blaze.

I liked the second slogan, "Barack you Rock!" better, but the picture of him in Uncle Sam garb also creeped me out.

I'd complain about the store not selling shirts picturing McCain as well (perhaps Talbot's carries them) except nobody wants to look at the old coot anyway.

What's the dog equivalent of a coconut?

They have a term for anglicized Hispanics in New Mexico (and perhaps other areas of the country as well). They call them coconuts.

According to this sled-dog trainer, "breeds such as ... Huskies ... actually are more comfortable in the cold than in a warm environment."

Oh really?

Perhaps he can explain why this is my husky's favorite way to spend her days as they heat up.

So what's the opposite of a coconut? White and furry on the outside, but brown and suntanned at heart?

Here, There, and Everywhere

I haven't had to travel all year for work, but now it's catching up with me.

Next week I'll be in Philadelphia for training. The spousal unit joins me on Wednesday night to stay the weekend. We'll be visiting Sideshow Bob. Any NY bloggers wanna trek down for a visit? Chel? BeckEye (I know how you love Philly)?

The following weekend I'm off to Woodstock for our annual summer meeting. Oh cool, rock and roll nostalgia! Nope. It's not that Woodstock. I'm headed to Woodstock, Vermont. Never been to Vermont before so it should be nice.

Then less than 2 weeks later the spousal unit and I are spending the week in Orlando with his sister and her husband and kids. I'll be working part of the time and plan to spend at least one day just lounging by the pool.

Before I know it the summer will be over. It's about 60 degrees outside today - it's hardly even started yet!

Scenes from the Apocalypse

We took a drive to the south side of town during our trip to NM a few weeks ago. We'd been told that a technological park "rivalling Silicon Valley" was being built in the area south of the airport. Not necessarily sold (people in Albuquerque always seem convinced that the rest of the country is on the brink of moving there), we decided to go check it out ourselves.

Also located in this area is a relatively new film studio. Seems production is cheap there and they are drawing some larger films. We'd heard (and the link above confirms) that T4 was being shot at the time.

So back to the tech park. We found one lonely building housing a solar energy company. Roads seem to be in place to support more, but who knows how long that will take.

What was more interesting were the cars on the road. It appeared they'd been hit by....something. We figured it was a set for T4. Check it out.

Note the CA license plates.

This fella got mangled pretty good.

Now I may actually see T4 so that I can say "Hey, I saw that!" when those cars show up in the film.

Local haps

I just have to clue you in on a couple things going down in the Mile High.

Ass Party Moratorium The DNC wants to scale back from 2 dozen convention shindigs to only 1? I don't like this. It greatly decreases my odds of sneaking in.

(begin digression)
Last night I had a dream that I was volunteering at the convention. I happened to pass a doorway just as Obama was walking out, and the guy seemed to be about 8 feet tall. Symbolism, anyone?
(end digression)

The other thing you just have to read about are the thong bandits. I made certain to find a link with pictures for this one.

The radio jocks had a field day with this one. "Man, can I borrow your chick's thong? My girl's ass is too big, it falls off my head!" Seriously though, you really have to wonder about these fellows' thought process when planning this robbery. Whose did they use? Why do they seem to match? If they were new, why not go with a pair of boyshorts instead? They'd certainly cover your face better.

And I'd hate to have been that convenience store clerk. Imagine realizing what they had on their faces and then trying to stifle your reaction.

The best part of the article is the descriptions of the perpetrators. "Last seen wearing...a green thong over his face." OK, I'll be on the lookout for thongface, but I'm not optimistic I'll see him.

Hawaii in My Backyard

I don't have a beach. Or even a swimming pool. No glorious sunsets with a golden globe sinking into the ocean. You can't see steep rain-forested cliffs from my deck.

But I do have a little slice of the tropics in a pot. Here's my hibiscus in full flower with 15 more blooms on the way.

Estrogen overload

Friday night was spent on a girls' outing to see the much awaited Sex and the City (or as I liked to call the TV series, Sluts and their Titties) movie. It was quite an experience.

First of all, there were 17 women in our group. Seventeen! I'm not sure I've been with that many females since I was a Girl Scout. I'm glad I'm not the one who had to deal with the dinner reservations.

We thought we were going to have time to throw a few back between the meal and the 11 PM show, but it was not to be. I was petrified of falling asleep. Luckily the restaurant obliged me by serving an espresso martini so I could get my caffeine and alcohol buzz simultaneously. Muuuuuuuuuuuuch tastier than Red Bull and Vodka.

Here's some shots of me and the other Sluts in our group who I actually knew.


We got in line at about 10:15 for the show. Besides theater employees and the occasional gay gouple, there was nary a male in sight. See for yourself. If our cycles were all aligned we'd have been able to change the orbit of the moon.


Once in, we actually managed to find seats together. Half our bunch fled to the loo or the concession stand, leaving the rest of us to hold their seats. One group of 5 girls tried to muscle their way into the open seats by saying that "they'd checked with management" and it was "illegal" to save that many seats. Illegal! There must be an obscure code written somewhere. They were actually trying to climb over the seats and snag them from the next aisle back. I think if a fight ensued we'd have all pled estrogen intoxication, but we managed to shoo them away.

I won't review the actual movie as to avoid any spoilers. I will say that my expectations weren't high given all the hoopla, but I didn't walk away unhappy.

Nice butt

Roscoe tries to hide when he hears thunder or someone raises their voice. This is what happens when the computer compartment in the desk is open and I have a bad moment on the job.

I guess we're lucky he didn't take out the cable modem!

Here Comes The Rain Again

Fallin' on my head like a tragedy
Fallin' on my head like it's not almost freakin' June already!!!

Shit weather in NM Thursday and Friday. More of the same when we got home last night. Summer sure seems to be dragging its feet this year, and winter still has spring tied up in the closet.

The good side is that all the plants look wonderful. I planted some zinnias, hollyhocks, and rose moss seeds before we left and they're all coming up. Sunshine after all this moisture should make them grow like weeds. Ha.

Yesterday before we left the mouse appeared again, but this time Roscoe caught it! We made him drop it for fear of rabies or hantavirus. Guess who got stuck disposing of the poor little critter? Yours truly! I picked it up with a couple of paper towels. It wasn't quite dead, and I didn't want it to suffer too terribly in the hot waste bin I was going to toss it in. So I put the entire bundle on the ground and stomped on it first. A little bit of bloody goo shot out from the paper towels. I was unsettled for a few hours afterwards.

No sign of mama robin today. I'm bummed and not looking forward to retrieving the eggs out of the nest.

Non-blogging vacation

Hi all, just thought I'd let you know I'm in Albuquerque for the holiday and not really blogging. You'd have been quite tickled to watch Ripley chasing a mouse on my mother-in-law's patio, or to see me jump a few feet in the air when the mouse ran out from under a bench straight towards me, but unfortunately the videographer was on a smoke break.

So, happy barbecuing to all! I'll let you know what the nest looks like when I get home next week.

Painblogging - now live!

I'm sitting in a periodontist's lobby waiting for the spousal unit while he has a tooth extracted. He grinds them at night and fractured one to the roots.

This is not pleasant. There's no doors in this joint and I can hear everything.

"Good job!" -frequently

"You're going to hear a sound, don't be alarmed..." WTF? I heard that sound out here!

"You definitely made the right call..."

And the constant grinding sound. He's getting a bone graft with something the dentist called "human bone product". Doesn't that sound nifty?

Etc., tweet tweet!

Wow.

Work and softball and wait, cancelled due to rain that wasn't and more work work work and birthday party and Iron Man, overrated and shopping for plants and bird feeders and food and dinner at The Med in Boulder, yumity yum and planting and digging and pulling and cutting and scraping and work and trip to the pharmacy and dinner and...phew!

I forgot to add in sleep and trips to the loo, but that's more or less what I've been up to since we last typed.

This little robin has been equally busy. She's got a nest on our porch. Opening the front door scares her off so I spy on her through the window.

I've been dying to see what the eggs look like, so today I busted out a ladder and the camera while mama and papa were out on a date, or whatever birds do while they are away from the nest. Aren't they beautiful?

Mama bird hasn't been back all day. I didn't scare her away when I took my pictures, did I? I was very careful not to touch nest or eggs.

Here's a little black and orange fella feasting on the bounty in my newly hung feeder. Orange head and chest, black everything else. Oriole, perhaps? You can see him better if you click on the picture. It's not all the bad considering digital zoom was engaged and it was taken through a screen.

Then later today a big grackle was trying to figure out how to land on the feeder without tipping it. He ended up just picking the leavings out of the rocks below.

Megan's Meme

Haven't done a meme in awhile, so here goes. Thanks Megan!

1. Pick up the nearest book.
2. Open to page 123.
3. Locate the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences on your blog and in so doing…
5. Tag five people, and acknowledge who tagged you.

"As he had for months now, Adams struggled to keep a balance with the need, on one hand, for all possible haste, and the need, on the other, to keep from pushing too fast, forcing events too soon. Some things, some people, must not be hurried. Time and timing were both of the essence, now more than ever."

I don't have that many readers, so everyone who reads this is tagged.